Taking shits under bridges

Greasebag chicken, baked potatoes and some jello

Greetings Friends,

Your friend and future mayor here. I’m just sitting at home drinking a tall can of shitty beer, sitting in my computer chair as my helper is cooking my dinner for me. What a rainy day! So miserable outside isn’t it?

I used to spend a lot of time underneath a particular bridge, right on the border of Etobicoke and Toronto. The Old Mill bridge, which crosses the Humber River, consists of two bridges: one to carry TTC trains on the Bloor/Danforth line, and one for cars on Bloor Street West.






I used to spend a considerable amount of my time either in parked cars in the parking lot below these bridges, or sitting on various rocks or tree stumps along the Humber River.

So many things used to bring me closer to what I call “Absolute Reality”; The realization of what is true and real in the world, moving beyond the misconceptions, perceptions, manipulations and other misleading factors that one is constantly being bombarded with, with ease and gravitas.

It is this Absolute Reality and the perception of what is real and what is not that is the foundation for all my forward thinking ideas. I bring this concept with me from my younger days sitting underneath the Old Mill bridge, by myself along the river or with a “date” in a parked car.

It is the feeling of pursuing something beyond my reach that brought me to experiment with ways that I could jump start this reality based binge. I was about 24 when I first tried crack cocaine. The rush and energy that it gave me after my first inhale was something that I will never forget. It was the most amazing feeling that I have ever experienced.

In those 20 minutes after taking that hit, rationalizations and logic became crystal clear. The sky was open and unobstructed. Shortly after that initial rush, however, everything came crashing down with a severe case of diarrhea, or the “crack shits” as I used to call them.

I would often return to this area to revisit and experience the pure rush of power and energy that crack would bring me. It wasn’t until much later in my life that I realized I was taking a shortcut.

If you follow one of the paths along the Humber River, you can still see my impromptu diarrhea hole; Overlooking the beautiful river. A gem hidden within a concrete jungle.

Thanks for listening

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